ephemera

What the F…riday!

Hi everybody! Hi Dr. Nedoff!

This tin came filled with 6pt type in the goodies with my press. I love it! Dr. Nedoff must be really proud of this one; it appears to only be prepared by him, as his signature proves that this is no imitation. I wonder if the market was awash with fake or inferior branded ‘Stomachic Tea?’

Perfect? AND pure? You bet! And with it’s thick, rich flavour, You can sleep easy knowing that even those guests with the most aesthetic of tastes will enjoy it.

Is there a tea that is not suitable for all hours of the day? Or indeed, would you wish to be invigorated last thing at night? Methinks Dr. Nedoff may be trying to hit too many targets here.

Yes, that’s right – NO flatulence! None. Not even the smallest tommy squeaker will issue forth after consuming this digestive beverage!

I think this is the first and only time I have seen the words ‘appetising’ and ‘flatulence’ together as a sales pitch. This raises some questions:

Is any kind of tea particularly prone to causing flatulence?

If you were suffering from flatulence, would you seek some sort of pharmaceutical assistance, make a pot of Dr. Nedoff’s finest?

Would you buy any other product that so proudly displayed its non-flatulatory powers?

By buying such a product do you, merely by implication, announce your inclination to be overly flatulent?

Is flatulance such of an issue that ordinary products need to modifed to account for the flatulent part of the market?

All consumables are required to be clearly labelled for allergens, vegetarians, organics, GM’s, calories, units and the like. I would like to see all foodstuffs rated on a flatulence chart as passed by the EU. I will be writing to my MEP.
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In total, the word flatulence (and it’s derivitives) have been mentioned 12 times in this post, including the ones in the pictures. I like that.

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